He made us side with Brady, now he’s making us admit that the Steelers were right. This guy is a monster

Does this put him in doubt for the opener?

+1 koala dangling from a helicopter

Dressage: There’s no way I’d be able to dance on all fours with Countess Becky from UpperDerbyShireWich whacking me with a switch. I’d turn on her and be put down before the NBC tape delay cut to another Mary Cirillo badmitten rant.

Boxing. That being said, if the right people are judging, dying mid-fight might not prevent me from winning.

Thank you for clicking on this Tim Tebow blog post.

“I will end you”

You would think this national embarrassment would lead to no one ever hiring a Brazilian pool boy again, but my stay at home wife STILL thinks Gabriel is just irreplaceable. sheesh.

Fun fact: The combined population of only the New York and Los Angeles Metropolitan Statistical Areas is 33.5 million.

Pay him no mind, he’s just salty because we own the moon, and he lives in a country that has flying poisonous crocodiles and no moon ownership.

For the landing?

“Nothing a new D battery can’t fix.” -Phillies fans

This tweet has been bothering me for 12 hours because that’s clearly a radio edit of the song, used just to try to make it fit the tweeter’s narrative, but he doesn't disclose that. I also hate myself for being a Santana/Ledecky Tweet Truther.

I lived in England for a short time around 15 years ago, and they would air a random MLB game at 3AM, which I would watch because sleep is for the weak. One of the play by play guys was raised in the US and played in the minor leagues, and the other hosts were blown away by his “encyclopedic” knowledge of the game.…

That explains Buster Poseys slide.

Now and forever: Get Bent

OK, because I’m essentially a bitter, working class crank who retches a little when sincere appreciation isn’t first coated in a thick layer of contempt: on Monday, when Trump buys Gawker to use as a clearinghouse for Benghazi stories, and the NFL buys Deadspin as a place “for NFL fans to be NFL family”, I doubt…

Yeah, but then you would get the inevitable “Whore Island” section.

·*not an actual hawk

Aren’t Ocelots also native to the Nevada desert? Las Vegas Ocelots would get a lot of cachet from Archer fans.