I'm a fully licensed pediatrician. Here's me with one of my favorite patients:
tippihedcase
tippihedcase
*pushes glasses up on nose*
This article needs a major nopetopus.
Hee! I like that.
Ferguson has shown America more than we want to see about ourselves, and that includes how many of us view race — or…
#notallbottles
Now my kids want to know why I'm doubled over laughing.
Or. Or.
A student told me this one: "How many feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?"
What do you call a herd of rabbits running backwards?
"A false sense of accomplishment" is what you get when you distill a PhD down to its purest form :3
What do I get if *I* win?
How many ears does Captain Kirk have?
Three.
The left ear.
The right ear.
AND THE FINAL FRONT EAR.
Mickey and Minnie Mouse were in divorce court. The judge leans over and asks Mickey, "So you think Minnie is crazy?" Mickey looks at the judge, shakes his head and says, "No, I said she's fucking Goofy!"
What do you call an empty bottle of Cheeze Whiz...
How did the hipster burn his mustache?
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Introducing new cats to each another can go one of two ways—they can either get along and start to play/plot your…
More like SMUGshot, right you guys?
I used to work as a tour guide, and I am an opera-trained singer. As usual, one of my coworkers had tipped off this group that I would sing for them if they asked while on my tour. Well, the group asked and I obliged with an abridged version of the Ave Maria. By the way, this song was my go-to for this situation…
I tell this story to everyone so I am totally outing myself here. Whatevs.