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timmyduncandietpepsi
Jul 30 2017
2

The Bloomin Onion is, in many respects, the worst thing since sliced onions. Bloomin also indicates a starchy oblong thing that kept the Irish alive, but in the present tense...like...”That onion is bloomin! “ they should call it The Zoomin Bunion. Who’s zoomin who? That’s what I say. Said.

Jul 30 2017
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He’s a doughy blue blood, been wearing cardigans and attending phony military schools since he was a young little shit. I guarantee he’s never been in a proper scrap in his life. Not only would just about any breathing human annihilate him in time measured in miniscules, he would fold like yesterday’s laundry.

Jun 23 2017
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Or, you know, fucking get rid of zoos.

Jun 23 2017
2

Rewind this scenario 150 years and it’s every classic shirty was terrible novel I had to dissect in Brit Lit. Ain’t that complicated. 1. Cholic 2. A wealthy dowager. 3. Fucking horses. 4. Rain. 5. Some fucking butler. 6. An average of 654 pages. I had a wonderful time in that class!

May 31 2017
2

I was eating alphabet soup at 5. And now.

May 10 2017
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Reading the headline ruined my day. What, Goop-face wasn’t available to present a power point on healthy looking poop? There’s way too many types of Kit-Kat bars. For Christ’s sake, ride the horse that brought ya. There’s a lot of moving parts here.

May 9 2017
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I’d Trumpcare equals endless supplies of cheap Xanax.....sold!

May 9 2017
10

I feel infinitely stupider for having read the passages Ivanks “wrote.” Must be the experience Jezzies endure reading my now grey posts. (I’m trying out this new self deprecration thing.)

May 3 2017
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Is any of this a surprise anymore? Reprensible, yes. But this seems to be the rule now and not the exception.

May 3 2017
11

Pinot Noir.... not a Pinot Noir.

Apr 19 2017
1

I’m looking for a little out of grey love.