Update (9:53 a.m.): Diniz has just collapsed on the course.

Wait for it.

Goats will eat almost anything

That is the least tempting food item I’ve ever heard described. Throw that crap in the toilet and let Liam wipe the rim with his disgusting sock.

Are you the guy who wrote the “what to do while unemployed” letter?

Honestly, this conversation has me convinced I’d watch a reality show based on the premise.

Eevee peasy.

Votto still should've caught it, the guy didn't touch it, it hit his glove. Regardless the dude should've known better but Votto should've caught it. Quit being a bitch.

This fan needs to remember what happened the last time a gorilla in Cincinnati didn’t respect its enclosure.

Let’s see that from a different angle so we can check to see if the fan is wearing a shit Skyline-eating grin.

I feel like it’s almost a Family Guy chicken scenario.

And after a year, you’re the guy who fought an ostrich for a year.
A horrific, terrifying year.

THAT IS A FLAIL, NOT A MACE. FLAILS HAVE CHAINS, MACES DO NOT.

I honestly think this is the single worst comment in the history of Deadspin.

Family Circus and Marmaduke are two of the worst things in human history, non-murder/war division.

I hope that Skip’s first guest is 2016 Presidential candidate Giant Meteor.

Lucky you! I have yet to see a Growlithe or Doduo. Those are mythical! Around here, it’s all Weedle, Caterpie, Rattata, Pidgey, Venonat, and Eevee.

I used to eat a 90 pack of Totino’s Pizza Rolls (pepperoni or fuck you) in about 2-3 days. I still do, but I used to, too.

Wait, right out of the box? You don’t cook it?

You’ve won three titles in five years.