As explained, there are tools for getting boogs out. We were handed a thing by the nurse just for that purpose when leaving the hospital with my infant child.

You have absolute shit for brains, pal.

The Lions spent 19 seasons with 2 of the top 10(?) most exciting players of all time. Winning isn’t the only source of relevance.

Remember the Titans.

He had an accomplice......Tom f’n Izzo.

Mike Ditka? How come your Kinja handle isn’t “Da Bearssss” or some shit like that?

I thought they were a local small business in west Phoenix till a few months ago. That’s when someone brought one to work, I said “Hey, they’re right around the corner from me”, to which they replied “When’d you move to Scottsdale”?

Yet, somehow they have “Nothing Bundt Cakes” across the nation.

Now is the right time for an openly gay NHL player. Just to play chicken with Marchand.

He must have a hell of a coach.

If you’re going to stand there and call Kendrick Perkins a “f——— p——”, a lot of bad things they wishin’ and wishin’ and wishin’ and wishin’ on you are going to come true.

Where do you work? I’d hate my generous tips to go to waste.

You know that episode of Black Mirror where the robotic bee swarm comes for society’s biggest assholes? The bee treatment for someone named “Flowers” is just too on the nose.

Idea: A library with a liquor license.

Patrice O’Neal on the importance of typing

Some portion of the decision making has to involve YOUR team. A highlight of the sentence is when your boys are the opponent du jour, but if they suck, too, why be reminded or worse, watch them lose. And they may not schedule often enough.

His hair does this but Jimmy Fallon messed up his hair in a manner that made his hair seem normal.

So, the big hero judge that stood by the gymnasts is just a piece of shit now?

I suppose going with a can is your answer.

Maybe they should let these great athletes use carts after all.