in the midst of chaos, you still have the presence of mind to whip out the snark. Kudos!

“I didn’t know NFL teams had homecoming games,” he said. “I thought that was a high school thing.” 

Crimson Cried: Connor Croll’s Call Criminal, Cops Claim

The Nationals’ front office only let Strasburg get through 60% of the hug before they shut him down.

He has children, Lauren

We have seen how basketball can be an important form of people-to-people exchange that deepens ties between the United States and China.

Maybe he should have disguised it as a United States Treasury bond.

Khan is intelligent, but not experienced.

Works at T-Mobile, drives a 12-year-old BMW, and is known by all of the 17-to-22-year-old women in Fort Lauderdale as a person to avoid.

Ain’t no Cousins apologizing for butt stuff down here.

Now apologize to Drew for being so butt when he can’t drink to numb the pain

Kirk Cousins
...
Being So Butt.
...
That’s So Raven.
...
Raven Butt.
...
Trent Dilfer.

*Trappequigne

In terms of mailing it in, this article is the Karl Malone Alaa Abdelnaby of articles.

The actual Tomsula Index is a list of businesses that will let you use their bathroom without having to buy anything. 

well, if nothing else, i can now see how he got his name.

What the fuck is a search engine?

Francesa, whether in his fictitious character or as himself, declaring that as “the dumbest fuckin’ bet I’ve ever heard of” pretty much guarantees that bet is going to hit.

I remember waiting for my mom at the bottom of a slide at Action Park, and when she hit the pool, her tits flew out.  So, my scars were only emotional.

Welcome to America in 2019, where Arians claim to be helping a Gay but really just want to set them further back.