“Melania knows that I call my daughter my girlfriend. That’s what I was talking about. I don’t have a girlfriend,” he said.

That settles it then.

Counterpoint: No, they won’t win today.

**Record Scratch** **Freeze Frame**

Wow. And to think I’ve erroneously called it ‘Cleveland’ for years.

What did I just read???

Don't worry. Goodell has already suspended the account.

Great, but we need a postal address to send the bag of dicks to.

That’s wild

Give that man a Yeti cooler

I didn’t realize that Alabama-Birmingham was a real school; I just that UAB was in Chapel Hill.

Make America Take Again

Posting from phone. Desktop’s processor melted.

Tokyo Sexwale? George Steinbrenner had finally gone too far in his nicknames for Hideki Irabu

This article could be called: "Your regular reminder that old white men are in charge."

Can you even imagine how good it’s going to feel when he finally gets off though?

But what if ace is low? WAKE UP AMERICA, THE FIX IS IN!

no, six. It mutated and grew an extra one.

My dog had the same eyelid surgery as Lisa. They actually had to remove the foreskin from his penis to create new eyelids. He is perfectly fine now, just a little cockeyed.