I think you meant Mel Gibson

**Record Scratch** **Freeze Frame**

“Nobody wants to see a playoff series between the two most entertaining teams in the league undermined by a mid-series suspension...”

No Tokyo Sexwale means this bracket is completely useless.

Killing a liver transplant patient?!

Everyone please cut Artie Lang’s son a break.

Johnny Football?

This is a perfect example why Viagra is a performance enhancing drug.

The Foreskin is strong with this one. Also his entrance music should definitely be the “Shaft” theme song.

He was hopeless against such stiff competition

“My comment wasn’t ideal, and it may put a dagger in the heart of my credibility as AD.”

I never was a fan of the shotgun formation, or the pistol, for that matter. There probably were several clips involved on the play, as well as multiple ineligible receivers in possession given the number of gunmen. The coach probably thought he had better take a shot at the endzone but these idiots beat him to it. But…

***Looks for Chopin on list, does not see it. Disregards article’s integrity.***

I’m sure many people would have gladly shanked her skirt, wedged their stiff-shafted wood in the there, looking for a hole in one. OK, I’m done for now with the offensive, sexist puns.

This story hit me so hard that I immediately had no appetite and dumped out my entire bowl of Flutie Flakes®

“He just smiled and gave me a vegeWhite sandwich”

Have we ruled out that he was just mad because the assistant wouldn’t sleep with his daughter?

Exactly. And that’s where the Cowboys and the NFL SHOULD (but may not) intervene, as they are mainly concerned with selling tickets and building fanbase and viewership. The sad part is, with all the money and resources they have, they should be the ones taking on responsibility and obligation to work with the guy to…

During his coaching tenure, no one took a more literal approach to “Seize the Day”.

Wow, she must have ice running through her veins....