I get it just fine. You’re the one amazed by people doing their jobs.

We’re still pretending the Grammys are about what songs/albums are better than the rest? Yeah? Huh.

She’s a professional actress. Playing a role is the job. Just because Jimmy Fallon cracked up in every other sketch and had a job for years doesn’t mean it’s the norm. She did a good job at what she was asked to do. She didn’t do anything superhuman.

No, he had a Democratic voter rally that was wink-wink about how silly both parties are nudge-nudge.

A large portion of America is as baffled as you are, if that’s any consolation.

Bottle blond is a bad fit for her skin tone, though.

I guarantee you he is a Harbaughian dickhead behind closed doors.

I guarantee you he is a Harbaughian dickhead behind closed doors.

THAT’S why Ray Lewis smiles so much.

“...the rap trio that’s both humorously and quite earnestly described as the Beatles of this generation...”

If it’s easy D he’s looking for, I mean, it might be hard to get away from the Secret Service, but I know a guy who can get you some EASY D if you have the money.

“I don’t even know how to explain it, you know?”

This is the insane and unprovable celebrity conspiracy theory I believe 100%. He conspired with his managers to fake it to give his story and star a nearly superhuman shine.

You think a woman who married Donald Trump for money gives a fuck who buys her shit so long as someone does?

There’s, like, a 40% chance this is also the way Wrestlemania 37 goes off the air.

Thank god, I mean, THANK GOD some rich people with melanin got invited to a rich person handjob-&-fingerblasting party. FINALLY.

Yup. It’s not really a racist joke so much as an observation about a racist behavior. I guess you could argue that it’s endorsing said behavior, but he’s not wrong. A lot of older Latinos really do feel that way.