You've misplaced the hyphen:

...You're a grown ass-man, make a grown ass-man face...

I really want to see a monster movie pitting giant tardigrades against (regular-sized) mantis shrimp

If you live into your 80's as a male, you'd do really well with the octogenarian ladies I'm sure.

I almost always tell the flight attendants as I get on the plane that I'm a nervous flyer and that I'll probably be making "crazy eyes" at them throughout the flight, especially if we hit turbulence. Often they'll give me a little nod or something if things get rocky. People can be really decent if you give them a…

About 20 years ago, I was flying back to NYC from Milwaukee and my boyfriend had literally just broken up with me (while dropping me off at the airport). I was/am terrified of flying, though I intellectually understand the physics and statistics, it's just a visceral reaction that I've yet to overcome. So I walk…

Rene Denfield wrote a book called Kill the Body, the Head Will Fall about women and aggression and violence. She argues that since women are not taught how to be physically aggressive or how to fight, that when they do get into a physical confrontation such as another woman or a child that they are actually a lot…

I have never in my life even entered a Wet Seal store, but I think I'm going to go buy a t-shirt or something from them this weekend. Good job, Wet Seal PR people (I mean that most sincerely.)

I kind of love Alex Jones' really crappy English accent. Didn't he pull it out when he lost his mind on Piers Morgan's show? He was nutty enough when he was just ranting about gun-grabbing conspiracies, but he's obviously enjoying the turd-flavored punch that David Icke is serving with much gusto now.

One of my very favorite displays at the Metropolitan Museum of Art. Found buried with somebody very important. Gotta take your brewers with you into the afterlife.

I'm guessing that they had discussed marriage somewhere along the line, like many couples do before actually getting married or even engaged.

You should never have to say that. A martini is made with gin. I'm not quite sure what that other drink made from vodka and served in an upside-down cone-shaped glass is called.

Scotch has actually read all of those hardcover books on the shelf and may have even written a couple.

Lambic is that guy who really really tries hard to make everybody like him and is often disappointed because nobody remembers his name.

This is why I don't sleep with married men. I'm a middle-aged lady and many (many!) of my friends have hooked up or gotten into ongoing relationships with married men at some point. I have no pair-bonding instinct, and marriage for myself has never been on my to-do list, but if a person has gone out of their way to…

Ugh? Really? This is just horrible and wrong! *Scaly* beast? No! All evidence points to dinosaurs having been covered in feathers.

I think I'm the same way. I hate when people apologize for being upset about something because they perceive my condition to be worse. No, you know what, when your expectations and hopes are undermined or thwarted it is upsetting, and that can be everything from getting fired from a job you loved to getting decaf…

My boss literally walked by my office and asked in a very concerned voice if everything is OK because yes, laugh-crying. Cakewrecks has the same effect.

OK, this post is over a year old but I'll play:

In 1973, the draft ended and the U.S. converted to an All-Volunteer military.

TheWireMonkey, here, there and everywhere. I mostly lurk on Ravelry though.

When my brother married his wife she had a 2 year old. She would say things like, "he's babysitting while I'm working" and he would have to correct her because he said you can't "babysit" your own kids (he was all in as stepdad from day one); Rather, he was taking care of my niece while her mom worked. Same for…