No, I’m there with you. I remember seeing it in the theater with several friends and being unbelievably bored. I was sure we’d sat through this thing for three hours or better and was dumbfounded to realize it was only 90 minutes.

Not gonna lie: just seeing Rick Moranis in the screenshot made me oddly happy.

You made it halfway? Hats off.

Jesus Christ no kidding. This isn't a game review, it's an editorial, and it's still about 800 words too long.

I am 100% here for your avatar! For years that was my picture in the corporate directory at work. :)

Except for that one time he slipped past airport security to accost a girl waiting to get on a flight because she had the same name as his mom...

That’s outstanding!

I saw Emo once years ago. His opening act absolutely KILLED, and I remember thinking “Shit, poor Emo!” I did not need to worry.

439 credits! Wow. And I thought Walter Brennan was in everything.

Naaaah. It can be done. I have no HOA in my neighborhood. Ten minutes to downtown, fifteen to my office (not that I go there much anymore). And meth dens? Sheeee-it. This place is down the street from me:

I originally read that as “Caravan of Carnage: An Ewok Adventure” and now I’m sad that’s not a thing.

Edit: Grr. Typo.

This video needs more jump cuts.

Yeah. Sandra Oh was fantastic. Everything else was forgettable. It’s great to see her in lots of (much better) stuff now.

This is one of the greatest pieces of writing I’ve read in a long, long time.

For whatever reason, in my mind I was thinking Richard, not Gene. Oh, the possibilities.

“The narrator, in either line-in-the-sand defiance to the singular ‘they’ or gross bigotry, settles on ‘it.’” 

It’s overrated.

“McIlroy stepped up to the tee on his first hole and proceeded to rip a drive way out of bounds, hitting a fan in the stomach and breaking her cell phone.”

Poor woman. Now what’s she going to do for the rest of the day? 

Well, at least they finally figured out “guy in a Sonic costume” wasn’t the right design.

Lynne Taylor-Corbett choreographed Footloose? That kind of blew my mind.

Jingle in the Jungle, of course.