And that right there sounds exactly like my Uncle’s garage. But god forbid you wore anything remotely sexual. You wouldn’t want people thinking you were a slut, now, would you?

Uncle Ben Carson

Here’s the link. Ugh.

I think that was his one creepy son who got the date wrong.

The real question.

I’ll be honest. I’ve never seen one of these catalogs. But how I laughed.

As soon as I saw the kitchen tools emblazoned with the word SMEG I thought of Red Dwarf.

Please god not Saffron. My father tried to convince my mother to name me that and I’ve been forever thankful he didn’t win. Especially when I discovered it’s the title of a racist AF erotica story.

Or that it was sex, but not sex sex.

I learned while making soap that cocoa butter will clog pores up faster then all hell. So any products with cocoa butter are not advised if you’ve got acne prone skin.

If you’re looking for unscented heavy duty lotion: Eucerin is the best. We use it in the nursing home I work and I use it myself in the winter.

Girl, AIM. AIM all the way.

One time, one time, I accidentally bought colgate and I think my husband got the vapors. He has only ever used the plain old blue crest.

Tom, there are other unscented soaps beyond Ivory. They exist.

I can understand if they were hesitant to deliver CPR because they assumed our breasts would turn into the Thing.

YEP! When my grandmother was in the hospital with massive plueral effusions my family was UP IN ARMS about her being listed as a DNR by my cousin (the POA). My cousin and I tried to explain that that didn’t mean they weren’t going to care for Grandma, or that Grandma was giving up-just that they wouldn’t be doing CPR…

I do do CPR to Another One Bites the Dust but that’s because I actually know that song like the back of my hand. I do not know Staying Alive as well.

That beluga is awesome.

I’d break someone’s ribs for repeatedly blowing their lawn clippings into my yard...

My step father was just laid off by Walmart. He worked for them for 20 years. He said a bunch of them were laid off. All had been with the company for over 15 years and all were over the age of 55. They’re filing with the EEOC for age discrimination.