Apologies, it's been fun, but I'm going to retreat to my own tower of song. I know you're thinking, hey, that's no way to say goodbye, but I'm afraid that time, she moves on. But hey, I'll be around, in fact, look for me on the 7 o'clock news.

Well Hallelujah! Turns out after all this time, Erg, you don't really care for music, do ya?

We had a groovin' thing going, but you lost me there, guess I wasn't born at the right time.

You're thinking of what's his name from Graceland.

Wouldn't recommend it. Have you ever heard the story of the late great Johnny Ace?

Better on vinyl, but nothing beats Central Park.

The obvious answer is no. All they had to do is name the song 'inagaddadavida' and everything would have made so much more sense!

Well sir, I think I can help you out here. I'm in a bit of a jam myself, it's a stalker. Let's look at this as a 'Strangers on a Train' situation. I'm in need of a bodyguard, and you need to get rid of your girlfriend. Well, if you be my bodyguard, I can be your long lost pal and we can run off together leaving her…

Answers to questions:

+1

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Dammit, +1

You know who really hates JR? Dallas.

Pink Flag is an all-time favorite! Hard to pick just one song from that one, isn't it?

I really enjoyed that. Nice!

Fantastic work Tim (and the rest of the Deadspin staff). For showing the sham, the hypocrisy of it all, it's fait accompli at this point yet strangely your detractors can't help but add on. Well done!

Jay Gruden's moving up fast in DC as he now has 'Eyes Only' level clearance.

Because today was long and tired...When I think of best songs under two minutes Wire and The Minuteman are the two bands that first come to mind, but you know what, I think this song by Scott Walker might have them all beat:

I followed Frank Thomas' career closely and it's true what Valentine is saying. Thomas did jump away from inside pitches, but not to draw walks, he just wanted a cooler nickname than 'Ouch!'

Before the second crash he was actually just six feet tall but he grew six inches just to compensate for his father's shortcomings.