“Hey, mister Gargamel. It’s done. Yep, all of ’em.”

Ugh, he fucks hotcakes on stage?

Yeah, the “undeniably brilliant” part made my eyes roll too. Lotta less-than-brilliant undergrads at any school, Ivy or no.

The team was asked about the extent of this and they lied. Now the lie has been found out. That tends to lead to heavier punishment.

I was confused about the putting-your-dick-in-hotcakes part too but then I remembered that Buzzfeed has some new instructional videos up?

THANK you. Somebody tell Joe Buck!

Read the Jezebel piece from earlier this summer on this — it’s really good. A lot of the stuff people are asking about/ speculating on here in the comments is addressed in that article.

Hear hear! Buncha self-loathing sellouts.

Ours. Ours can overcome that.

“Nobody grows more beards than I do.”

Same. Jesus.

“Let’s start using discernment, right after I finish typing some stuff about Hitler. Almost done. Okay . . . go!”

The tail thing wasn’t even a dare though right?

I want him on the “Here’s what failed primary candidate and current Trump surragate _____ is saying today” beat. His requiem for Bobby Jindal was delicious!

Agreed, his stuff is always worth reading.

So my two favorite writers on this site will be writing even less?

Tough but fair.

What if he grabs a disabled veteran by the pussy?

Romberts. Fuck. Fuck me. Go Mariners.

“Rom Roberts is Ryan Sullivan”?