This team really is committed to illegally getting stuff released from their balls.

They’re all the same age when I corner them in a bathroom

- Mark Chmura

Yeah! What IS the difference between 17 and 18?

52 kids under him? I thought he was a Steeler, not a Cardinal. 

Here’s my Siberian Husky buddy, Linux. He’s 5. Finally learned that naps are pretty cool. He’s a good boy with bad habits that stem from my boyfriend having acquired him while living with 5 other early-twenties dudes who had ZERO interest in enforcing training rules (like no human food for the doggy). Now we just have…

I’ve owned a Siberian for 12 years and let me tell you....NOTHING prepares you for the maintenance and attention they require. Took me forever to outdoor train him, and the hair sheds off in HUGE amounts. Amazing dogs tho, and one of the most intelligent out there. Here he is!

A huge blow to the Chevy Cringle. 

He was initially charged with reckless driving but after review it was determined the guy wasn’t set and the call was reversed. 

As bad as this is for Nike, this was a far worse look for them:

I think we are all waiting for Rovell to tweet about how this impacts Nike’s bottom line.

Obviously it’s going to be revealed that Westeros is merely one of the parks owned and operated by Delos.  All the characters are hosts, except for Daenerys, who in real life is heir to a cosmetics empire.  

Frankly, the real victim here is Alison Chu’s vagina

Obligatory:

Broke the barrier.  No longer Virgin.

Try this on for size:

Fat Donny Smallhands

They’re gonna invade a country just to win an election aren’t they?

LEAVE ME OUTTA THIS.

There was a girl I knew once, freshman year of college. We were at a party but the two of us ended up in the corner talking over some drinks. We talked and talked and just really hit it off. Eventually, it turned flirtatious. Slowly, but perfectly flirtatious. As the party started to wind down, she invited me back to…

If they go around tranqulising all of the cougars they find, it’s really going to mess with the California dating scene.