Unlike the baseball, however, your wife’s seams are looser than ever.

Harper has hit 31 homers so far this season. That was once an impressive accomplishment. Now it’s a middling amount of homers for a power hitter in this league.

The real punishment should go to the people who planned a SUNDAY wedding, Week 1 Sunday no less.

Sign for a kid, he sells it on ebay once.  Dunk on a kid, he has a bar story for life.

Which would you really rather have when you grow up?

Kind of shocked by this.

Security experts have confirmed that it only took the offender three attempts to break the account’s password: GUMBOGUMBOGUMBO

Steelers fans like him again now

I saw them open for the Sex Pistols once. Afterwards, Pearl Jam came on the stage as a surprise act.

I’m not sure I’d want to see Intergluteal Cleft opening for anyone.

Good!!  Having a whale tail should be grounds for immediate disqualification! 

I’m not sure I’d want to see Intergluteal Cleft opening for anyone.

“Intergluteal Cleft” would be a FANTASTIC name for a rock band.

I felt like a David Attenborough narration would have helped the reader on this one.

I am absolutely stunned that someone who brings a casket to a tailgate might also have some questionable racial beliefs.

A guy with a ridiculous accent, wearing a flat-brimmed camo hat, filming videos in the front seat of his car is the voice of reason in this story.

This read like a article in an anthropological journal about some uncontacted tribe in the Amazon. 

So wooder they all mad about exactly?

deGrom’s agent last year lobbied the Mets for days about Mesoraco being deGrom’s catcher because of comfortably concerns. This year, deGrom’s agent is now the General Manager, and he can’t be bothered with the request. 

This is so stupid. If you can’t figure out a way to have 35 of your starting catchers 40ish off days fall every 5th day to literally give your team a better shot at winning, then . . . wait, shit. Sorry. Mets. Got it.