They forgot the obvious one:

Send John Connor back into time to eliminate Colin Kaepernick as a twelve year old.

Satan’s Ashtray: scotch and bong water.

Six moons should give Boban enough time to perfect his bread recipe, made out of the ground bones of an Englishman.

SHIT THAT SUCKS, RANKED

“I’m not sure what Hosmer means by ‘turn around.’”

May this movement catch fire like a mighty river.

Holly Holm once knocked her into next week and she certainly doesn’t want to experience that again.

this is goodminton

SHUT UP AND EAT FRESH!

goes even better with “Gary’s Got a Boner” from Let it Be by the Replacements

I liked LeBron before this comment.

it definitely sets a president.

But did he lead off with Whoa Black Betty?

I used to have a giant picture of Immortan Joe in my office (in a very fancy frame) but my boss made me take it down because “it was freaking people out.”

don’t talk about my girlfriend like that.

My wife is a slut.

Trick question! They never do a good job

I think the technical term is “sandwich cannon”

I can relate. On way to work today my shoe became untied. I faced the uncertain fear of stopping to tie it and risk being run over or push on. I decided to press on in constant fear of possibly tripping. Barely made it.