Farts funny  at any age

Toddlers do so much stuff with their own bodies and with other people’s bodies - it’s at worst a nuisance (in the ‘put your pants back on!’ sense) - until someone sexualizes it in adult terms (‘Is Jack an exhibitionist?’) - then it gets weird. I was not really surprised by this video because I’ve actually had to talk…

Yeah...it’s the ascribing a sexual fetish to something a toddler is doing that grosses me out. 

I prefer Mindy Kaling's policy of never showing her daughter's face on social media

But did you film it and post it to social media where you have thousands of followers? It’s not the kid's behaviour that’s the issue here, it’s the adults'

Adults only anything has my immediate attention.  

Brought to you by Quentin Tarantino.

I don’t think a toddler sucking on toes is anything worth getting in a blather about, but I have NO idea why a parent would hashtag it “footfetishonfleek.” First of all, boo, you’re not really using fleek right. Second, THAT’S what made it weird.

Kids do weird crap. I’ve never had one stick my toes in their mouth but not for lack of trying. I’ve had one sneeze in my mouth. I’ve had one lick my ear. Bite my hands. Literally put their butt on my face.

Don’t ask to babysit? Are their neighbors 8th grade girls looking to make money over the summer to buy designer jeans before school starts? Maybe I’m way off on what their neighborhood is like, but I imagine more wealthy folks inclined to recommend nannies than to babysit. (“Oh DO reach out to Mrs Terwilliger, she was…

Kids do weird and freaky stuff that’s often hilarious.

I keep hoping ‘Armie Hammer Toes’ will happen, but so far no one’s going with me on that.

What do I call ‘em? Internet parents? Some with kids, some not I’m sure... but all vocal fucking assholes.  If a child clearly is not in danger, abused or hurt, just shut the fuck up and keep your damn opinions to yourself.  Oooooo Snooki was drinking wine, toddlers putting everything in their fucking mouths.  I also…

One place I worked at some dude came off the street, plugged his electric scooter into the outdoor socket, chained up his ride and walked away. We quickly found the breaker for that socket and killed the power. The look on that guys face when he came back after 2 hours and we were trying not to laugh out loud.

Remember this guy? He did it right

It probably didn’t help the lawn, either.

Next time tuck it under the windshield wiper... takes them longer to find it, and the results speak for themselves!

Of course not - they were out of power.

Please, I’m an even bigger saint, I would’ve given his car both the electricity and whatever loose paving stones I could find lying around.

Who are these people?