And this is surprising...how? Like Republican women who find themselves being disrespected, well, sometimes the Face-Eating Leopard WILL eat your face!

95% of this is like, yeah, that sucks. 5% though in my mind is “my diamond shoes pinch.” Pretty people get a whole lot of benefits that the rest of us don’t get, and these women will be treated like gold by the average person for the rest of their lives.

Then she never gets put in a corner.

I feel like the real drama would be in the, “Man, I was fat then. Then I got skinny. Then I was REALLY fat. Then I lost some weight. Man I looked good then. Holy shit I was fat” until the inevitable “And that’s when I got fat for good”

it’s like they don’t WANT you to have children. They want you to tear your chest hair out and go running nude down the highway instead.

It’s great news that the cops kept their composure and didn’t commit any “shooting fouls”

Buncha sissies. My parents drove us in an un-airconditioned Pontiac from New Jersey to Miami when I was about 7. Parents controlled the radio - not every car had a radio in 1953 -my father controlled the rest stops. There was no I-95 back then so we went the Baltimore, Washington D.C. route etc. It seemed always to…

If I wanted to play this from the Conservative playbook I would order $300 worth of pizzas from Papa John’s and then post a video of me throwing them in the trash.

Chef: MY MOM

As a gentleman who weighs 224 pounds and has only ever been “not really fat” AT BEST in his life, I say unto you: fuck off, sir. Fuck off good and hard.

The other night I drank some cheap beer and then took a piss and let it mellow, and when I came back to the toilet in the middle of the night to piss again, the smell nearly gave me a concussion.

I just got into an argument about red delicious apples with my boyfriend last night. We had 1 apple left for a cheese plate, and I thought it was one of my good ones, not his trash apple.

This is loooong...but stay with me....

So are Trump’s hands as small as they say?

Rebrand it as “Barr None”.

Reading this thread reminds me of the true happiness I found when I stopped driving. Even the smelliest subway car is better than the hair pulling rage of heavy traffic.

“Are you saying Boo, or Gui?”

An asshole exists. Color me surprised.

Jason ‘White Chocolate’ Williams?