Like they would know what it looked like. PLEASE FOOLS you can’t even find the clitoris.

It’s almost like he’s just a person and not imbued with the spirit of a random god.

I really, truly hope that the tone isn’t, “let’s make fun of Ryan Reynolds for severing a friendship with someone who betrayed him.” Umm, how dare he?

I’ve had jobs that were worse than unemployment. I’ve also had the misfortune of having to stay at a job that beat me down for years.

Also, note that for this subject in particular, the employee really has to have screwed up in a unique and interesting way for anyone to have a reason to care about the story. If you specifically requested a sandwich with no mayo, and a server then brought you a sandwich with mayo on it, well, I’m very sad for you,…

Cool story, bro

The soup of the day is usually Hitler miss, but I’m sure you’ll just Goebbels up today’s gestapo soup.

If I had a nickel for every time cum came out my nose....

Shit like this is still happening. Rich/powerful dudes taking advantage of their upper hand in the dynamic to fuck women or rape them is a pretty common thing. Not much of a hyperbole.

Counterpoint: Hyperbole is the greatest tool for stressing a point ever.

So, I’m reading this book about Josephine Bonaparte right now, and recent chapters have been about how Napoleon would basically just pick out a woman that he liked, “arrange” for her to be brought to wherever he was, fuck her till he got bored, then either banish her if she annoyed him, or set her up with a nice gig…

“Who knew the nurses of America moved like the mob?”

Bobby Brown thinks he could have prevented Bobbi Kristina’s death. In an interview airing Monday on The Real, he said, “If I could have been there two days before, it wouldn’t have went down like that. We prayed and hoped for six months, you know, for something better to happen, but when God calls you, he calls you.”

Maybe Katie is donning wigs and disguises to throw off the shady Scientologists who stalk and torment people?

And then your friend heard him terminated the engagement and joined you in firing him to pluto in a bucket, yes?

The people are fun to laugh at in this story but the fact there’s a weekend edition of BCO is undeniably proof God exists.

Don’t forget all the civilians in Afghanistan or the civilians in Pakistan or the innocent people in Yemen and so on.

We could add to the 9/11 name scroll all of the innocent civilians killed in our little war against Iraq. A country who had nothing to do with 9/11.

It also claims that her clerks were “coerced by the threat of contempt sanctions” into granting marriage licenses.

Your Honor, we submit a Morion to Reconsider to this Court, arguing that the Duggar re-direct to Jessa’s wedding appears to be a shameless attention-grab, and that Michelle Duggar has not demonstrated the mental capacity to grasp the subtleties of the concept of Shade.