That’s not a celebration, that’s a suicide attempt.

my time with my mother would then consist entirely of the first half of sentences. ;) But I agree, repeating entire sentences (or, gawd help me, paragraphs) is exhausting. At one point, between deaf mum, selectively deaf DS and deaf SO, I was going mental saying everything at least twice, all day, every day. What a…

Doc really wanted that And .4

“Report: A Body Has Been Found at Apple Headquarters”

Oh, this is about exercise and not compressing my actual misery.

Yes, anyone who has ever watched most bugs for five minutes could’ve told them that a bug will hide on whatever material is the closest in color to its own body.

Hush, they're trying to science.

Why are we surprised that cyclepaths are killing people? That’s what they do. Haven’t you watched any of those Hannibal shows?

Two Brazilian cyclists died? That’s horrible. How many is a Brazilian anyway?

I love this advice on buying a home: get a mortgage where the payment is no more than 25% of your take-home pay on a 15 year fixed rate mortgage. That’s it. Those are your guidelines. (26%, 28% is OK). The point is, your payment won’t take up so much of your income that you can’t do anything else, and you will have it…

How about a smartphone with a battery that lasts more than a couple of hours?

Diesel engined vehicles also need breathers on their diffs, gearboxes etc just the same as petrols.

You have no idea how many Titans fans want this to be true. I’d wager at least both of them do.

What makes you think Mike Mularkey won’t be replaced by Jeff Fisher in a few years? Fisher is playing the long con here.

Let me explain it to you in Stanley Cup Playoff overtime terms...oh wait, you’re Canadian, you wouldn’t understand that either.

That’s why you never talk about having a gun or show anyone you have a gun until your are convinced you have to use it and are ready to pull the trigger.

Obviously the plane is 100% at fault, because pedestrians always have right of way.

The only aliens allowed at Augusta are the grounds crew.

I’ll go to my grave believing that if Kentucky played Tyler Ulis over Andrew Harrison last year they would’ve won the National Championship (probably should’ve played Devin Booker over his brother, too).

Pedestrians only have the right-of-way under specific circumstances, such as a controlled crosswalk.