For some reason the thought of the story from Christian Grey’s perspective has me thinking of this:

Those ads are shot like a shitty porn. At the end of it, it says “Body Blended Whisky,” so I’m wondering if that literally just means that one of the porn ladies has physically touched and shaken up the bottle of booze? Or do they bath in it or something before bottling it? It does say “the thought of the same whisky…

Because each bottle is 12 years old

Many of us chipped in some cash to buy him a hooker to give him a BJ in the back of a van for a birthday gift.

World condemnation of the Holocaust, and the heroic actions of the people who fought against it were actually a reaffirmation of faith in humanity. But with regards to you. You know, trolls be trollin’.

I agree. The cynical part of me, though, worries they’re (Republicans) doing this to have something to point toward as they continue to attack women’s rights on other issues in election season. I mean, technically this should already be a crime, it just isn’t being pursued or people charged. Afterall, you’ll be…

Niki Minaj spreads like syphilis whereas Ariana can’t delete your picture from her mind?

Those replies...I feel like every day I lose a little more faith in humanity. Although I suppose the news itself restores a little faith. Regardless, the fact that people are shitty enough that such a request needed to be made to the DOJ takes some faith away. The fact that somehow a Republican controlled house backs…

Hehe. Thank you for that photo.

How would, say, a funeral proposal rank vs this? I have not experienced one (has anyone?), but lets say, just after saying some final words for Grandpa, little Billy says he has something special he wants everyone to share with him and pops the question right next to the ol’ open casket? Also, considering that America…

Decidedly not worse than wedding proposals.

Ah ha! Clicking through to the link always provides good additional info. When I read “her child’s elementary school teacher,” I assumed it was the kid’s current teacher.

KENS 5 reports that a parent discovered the Pinterest page of her child’s elementary school teacher after doing a “quick search online.”

I hope the next article I see on Josh Duggar can be summed up with this:

Wow. It feels strange and wonderful to read about a government trying to help its constituents. A rare feel good story in the news. Now lets just hope the state senate doesn’t fuck it up.

How should I be reading #7tormscoming? Seven torms coming? What does that mean? I understand that his number is 7 and all that, I just don’t get how replacing the “s” in storms with a 7 actually makes something coherent.

If you’re going for a statement item, wouldn’t it be better to somehow manipulate how the tampon absorbs so that once used, it soaks to form her desired message of “pussy power” or something?

My wife’s family is always going on about how we need to move to Austin because it’s a bustling city, great music and food scene, family friendly and all that (they’re from around there), and articles like this serve prove my counter-point, “But then we’d have to live in fucking Texas,” to be irrefutable.

My first impulse was to revel in the delicious irony of all this, then I remembered a pre-teen was raped (at least I assume. Not sure what penetration could entail without being rape, but then I don’t want to spend time brainstorming it) and a 16 year old had to watch this pervert masturbating. That said, thanks for…