BUT BLAKE BORTLES’ EMAILS

Check your facts. He has a ring for SB XXX.

“Reid: [looks for pause button]”

“This is true. I walked into a job interview with the screen half of a Toshiba T1850, that I had won in a round robin wrestling tourney behind a Boston Market, and I got the Niners gig. Should have seen the son of a bitch who ended up with the keyboard.” - Tomsula

I gave up on love after Danny DeVito and Rhea Perlman called it quits.

Non si può stoparlos!

“And don’t forget Giancarlo Stanton.”

Somebody call up Laura Ingram at Sandals because the public needs to know which High Schools Josie got rejected from

She needs to learn CPR and shut up.

Wait a minute...you’re telling me that the coach’s name is Muffet McGraw, and that’s not the lede of this story?

Muffet McGraw is the most women’s-basketball-coachiest name that ever named a women’s basketball coach.

Chuck up, and miss, a ton of shots but still take (and make) the game winning shot? Arike really does idolize Kobe.

Clean steal of home against a righty!

It also works in Basketball!

+1 safety school

That’ll teach Geno to drink from a Dasani bottle.

I think we can all agree that NBA referees generally need to chill out with the techs and ejections, and that no basketball game is improved by having one of the best players in the world removed from it because he got mad.

Good to see that a 43 win season after half a decade of being an embarassment to basketball has the Sixers talking shit.

Or as Eric Trump calls them, “jelly beans.”

Not one, but two women let Jr. flop around on top of them. Incredible.