What’s more more, he isn’t even good at his job, even if you somehow ignore the “he actively attempts to shorten the careers of the league’s most marketable players” part!

the 90-yarder is the best because Williams had the safety lined up per usual 20 yards back and Odell still ran by him like the safety was Gregg and Odell was a head coaching job

Not the Antonio Brown come back story I expected.

Never attribute to kayfabe that which is adequately explained by the mere existence of the Raiders.

NFL Pro Bowl nods are almost meaningless. 6+ QBs make the pro bowl from each conference because non participants. Cassell was always terribad.

I can’t wait to be old enough and hammered enough in a bar at 2:30 in the afternoon that a punch to the head from a pro fighter doesn’t even phase me. A young, drunk buck would have tried to retaliate. This grizzled old man doesn’t even give McGregor the satisfaction of being preturbed.

Honestly the best bar stool sports content I’ve ever seen. 

Drunk Irish guy punches other drunk Irish guy. This is the kind of scoop I come to Deadspin for.

How’d you get a picture of Kershaw through Vin Scully’s eyes?

Wait, so they were “visiting a friend” when they noticed they were out of juice, and their friend wouldn’t let them leave the car there to charge? 

Tow? If that’s my property, that’s an immediate tie the other end into my 2-phase 220 outlet, grab a beer and watch the fun.

No need to call the police for everything. Sort it out youself! Christ. 

Joule thief!

Dude is an absolute saint, if only because he’s waging a one-man crusade against the Florida Man stereotype.  

Boris Johnson’s favorite part about EuroLeague basketball is watching Europeans get punished for traveling

I was tempted to give it the benefit of the doubt because I once got a blowjob in the parking lot of the Rooster T Feathers comedy club, but then I realized Rooster T Feathers is in Sunnyvale, not Santa Clara.

Presidential candidate NFL coaching equivalents:

shout out to the REAL MVP the rich mf’er who had season tickets to the 2 seats i sat in every game and only showed up to like 4 games the entire season

First of all, not going to shed a single tear for Giants fans, who have celebrated three more world series wins this decade than any team I root for.