How would you feel if you looked silly for not finishing the original post and missing the punch line?

This may be the single most idiotic comment of the last day.

Wait, Samer's not an intern?

Of course, had he beaten his wife, he only would have been suspended 2 games...

Clearly, I live in a perfectly airtight world, and I have to switch my oxygen supply every 30 minutes or else I die. I'm allowed to to be hydrated through I.V., through my feet, when at my desk, but that's it.

Given you are correct.......I would bet that 99% of the time a Laptop is actually kept in a Laptop bag. Also, the glove compartment reference is pretty outdated since car heating exist.

baseball was reignited by the Bonds/Sosa home run race.

People who want page clicks from derps

Because young people are sooo stupid, right? And all older people are so much "wiser" and "smarter." Are we still buying this archaic ageist bullshit?

This is the Newelliest post, ever.

Yes yes this is very impressive athleticism. Can someone tell me if it's possible to turn off the Vine auto play on an iPhone ?

I always hate it when somebody makes a joke that gets tons of stars and I don't understand it!

indeed. the contrast also shows us that beyonce is a stronger and better singer than taylor swift.

It seeks unspecified money damages.

Taking photos with 2 phones simultaneously - more mad skills.

I'm not convinced you haven't suffered from head trauma.

Well, he all but admitted there was plenty he didn't want to make public. But will Deadspin dedicate more than 50 words to this story or will it continue to give Kluwe a pass for having what amounts to infantile, cheap fun at the expense of child rape victims?

"I never made a hole-in-one, but I did hit a guy, and that's way more satisfying. You're supposed to yell "FORE!" but I was too busy muttering "There's no way that's gonna hit that guy"

Yo