If he did, then he is a gigantic fuckwad. Well, either way he’s a gigantic fuckwad.

Here, let me help you

I’m guessing, if you asked, she’d run away very quickly, leaping over any obstacle in her way.

English versions:

It was a longstanding record, and she had to overcome many of life’s hurdles to break it.

Numbers are notoriously dishonest, and Dylan Byers, who the hell is he? Donald’s never heard of him and neither have I. The RNC was yuuuuge, very big, totally great.

Oh the Family Research Council doesn’t like him? I’m in.

Spoiler alert: it'll be nasty and thoroughly dishonest.

The man’s not a Palin, he was given 100% rating by Planned Parenthood.

Just a reminder that back in ‘08, when Obama picked Biden, everyone was like “That boring old white dude?” And now we’re all like UNCLE JOE PLEASE DON’T LEAVE US.

If Mr. Melluso once caught a 26 pound lobster, why was he “skeptical” about someone claiming to have one that was 15 pounds?

The whole thing makes no sense for it’s alleged purpose.

Wingdings: Coincidentally, the same font used for Trump’s speech last night. (As translated from the original German.)

❽🕈♒♋⧫ ♓⬧ ⬥❒□■♑ ⬥♓⧫♒ ♋ ◻♏❒⬧□■ ◆⬧♓■♑ ♋ ♌♋⧫♒❒□□❍ ◻❒□❖♓♎♏♎ ♐□❒ ⧫♒♏ ⬧♏⌧ ⧫♒♏ ⬥♏❒♏ ♌□❒■ ⬥♓⧫♒📪 ♓♐ ⍓□◆ ⬥♋■⧫ ⧫□ ♍♒♋■♑♏ ⍓□◆❒ ♑♏■♎♏❒ ⬧□ ♌♏ ♓⧫📪 ⬥♏ ♋❒♏ ♋ ♐❒♏♏ ♍□◆■⧫⍓📪 ♌◆⧫ ♎□■❼⧫ ♐□❒♍♏ 🖰 ⍓♏♋❒⬧ □●♎ ♍♒♓●♎❒♏■ ⧫□ ♌♏ ♏⌧◻□⬧♏♎ ⧫□ ♒♋❖♓■♑ ⧫□ ⬧♒♋❒♏ ♌♋⧫♒❒□□❍ ♐♋♍♓●♓⧫♓♏⬧ ⬥♓⧫♒ ◻♏□◻●♏ ⧫♒♋⧫ ♎□■❼⧫ ⬧♒♋❒♏ ⧫♒♏ □❒♑♋■⬧ ⧫♒♏⍓ ⬥♏❒♏ 👌□◆❒■♏ 🕿⬧♓♍✆ ⬥♓⧫♒📪…

Really do recommend that people read the whole message. It really is incredulous.

At least you get the president referred to by his name. Half the shit I see talks about some guy named ‘Barry’ who runs the ‘Democrat’ party.

Are there bathrooms out there which either: a.) use nothing but special toilets which require a specific set of genitalia to use; or b.) force you to watch everyone else use the toilet at the same time and stare at their genitals? I lived in North Carolina for the first 25 years of my life, and I don’t recall coming…

I mean, it’s not even accurate. He probably doesn’t even own any minorities.

I’m not sure it was really necessary to refer to the Cuban-born Sabates as a “minority” in this racist headline.

Now, THIS is a type of message you save the comic sans font for!