I didn’t try to make the criticism fair.  I just answered your question.

Poe’s Law.  It’s impossible to make a satire so extreme than literally no one will believe it to be true.

Any law that makes abortion a federal right will be challenged by one of the states that already banned it and the Supreme Court will declare that law unconstitutional in a week.  There’s no federal solution now, only by expanding the court or waiting for all these Federalists to choke on bile and die is this going to…

The version of Zemo that’s absolutely committed to killing anyone he meets with anything resembling superpowers is going to be a hard sell as a member of the hot new super team, I think.  Maybe we’ll get lucky and Sam Rockwell will be around as their tech guy though.

Nope, they’ll throw her under the bus immediately. She’ll be being called a radical leftist nazi by her next church Sunday. She’ll probably have to move out of Texas entirely before lunatics burn her house down.

In this case it’s weird that it wasn’t, since that spice blend has been on store shelves for like ninety years, annual dumbfuck barrage of thinkpiece articles about Starbucks aside.

Sorta doubt some guy in a store was gonna search your reusables, that’s illegal basically anywhere in the US.  They can ask, but that’s your private property so they can either call the cops or piss off.  Just don’t try that anywhere you joined some kind of membership like Costco.  But at Wal-Mart?  Fuck that receipt…

That’s nice and I’m sure they’re nice but niceness isn’t allowed to defy the ban on vaccine mandates in your flat-ass swamp.  Then again I assume you’re cool with them pulling out because they have to.

Somehow still more useful than any given episode of Loveline.

The only things I can think of more hacky than getting up there to do the dance from Pee-Wee are

There’s still the matter of “Doctor on advice show hears obvious cry for help, responds with probably useless factoids and weird pseudoscience about pheremones.”

That’s a dwarf prince.  His dad is the King, we saw him at the end of the episode.

Trust that if it was made a federal law right now it’d just be declared unconstitutional by the same court that reversed RVW anyway.

They did say he went hunting for Sauron after the war and was killed.  Maybe not by Sauron directly, but certainly by his minions.

They’re not proto-hobbits, they’re just a type of hobbit.  In the second age the three types were a lot more separate, so while these are Harfoots, there’s also Fallohides and Stoors around.  Mostly they’re defined by what other species they’re similar to.  Harfoots are closer to humans, Fallohides to elves, and…

They live in heaven.  They don’t have to work by our physics and shit.  Maybe in Valinor animism is just the way shit works and yeah rocks float because they want to touch the bottom.

Yeah, I found it funny when they said that elf-human pairings had ever happened twice, given that everyone remembers Beren and Luthien, but apparently not Tuor and Idril or Dior and Nimloth, both elf-human parings that resulted in Earendil and Elwing, who are both half-elves and Elrond’s parents.

Slavery leading to enhancements is sadly and strangely a D&D staple. The number of monsters that are “Inventions of a mad wizard for his use as a labor and guard force” is insane. Though yeah, the answer to the question of “how did slavery make them sapient” is it didn’t, it happened the other way. They were made…

Oh shoot, I never thought of that point before, thanks!

No but seriously I get it, but the bit felt out of place, this a legal comedy, not the Fresh Prince.  YMMV, I guess.

And in honor of the death of a great, charitable, and wonderful man, here’s a loose five on how trans people are mean to me!