Many of the mussels in this paella were taken from skeletal remains of the Spanish Armada. That’s how great a cook Martha Stewart really is.

If there’s copious amounts of lesbianism, then I’m in.  Otherwise, no.

Perhaps you’d find Victoria’s steam-powered mechano-vibration machine.

The new Russian Minister of Silly Walks.

I wonder what those inscriptions on the flag say?  “Love to the gang, Rudi!”

Where’s the meat dress made of Trump Steaks?  Asking for a friend.

I’d like to see Taylor Swift and Karlie Kross “trooping the colour.”

Tracy: “You got a fast car. I’ve got a tarantula right here on my head.”

You can change him. He needs your magic.

Too many impossible things happened in that movie for my taste. It certainly lives up to its name.  It was fun though.

What about people without a brain like you?  Where do you go?

M-O-O-N.  That spells Kaylor.

We’re baking a cake.  A delicious vanilla cake.  That’s how we’re coping.

For those unaware, courgette is not a stewed one of these.

We have a President made from fish oil, so yeah, a scam.

Thoughts and prayers.  Because that’s what you need when you’re a mega-rich star.

Beach impalings are way down since 1066.

You sick people are making way too much of this.  She baked a cake.  Baking is fun.  Cakes are delicious. That’s it.  That’s all.  Now, bring me a shrubbery.

My hope would be that he’s being unsuccessfully treated for a massive infection of flesh-eating bacteria from swimming in the cesspool of the Administration.

I would have told him the prescription was to curb my astonishing and cruel random acts of violence when provoked.