They look like a couple of nice kids going to a Taylor Swift concert.

It was Charlie Sheen in the Drawing Room with the Candlestick.

Well, if she decides to love a woman, I hope it’s with me.

The only way to win is not to play.

She’s better than Bobby, and better than you. Consider yourself demoted to Captain Burn.

She may be a terrible songwriter, but she’s better than you.

John Kelly is 3/5ths of a human being for purposes of enumeration of the population to apportion representatives.

Kevin Spacey took money from Russia to influence American erections.

The Republicans have made their cake and now they must lie upon it.

“A great man once said, everything is about sex. Except sex. Sex is about power.”

Next review: America’s Swiftiest Snakes

Their names were Mulder and Scully.

If California were creative, the infrastructure surrounding ICE facilities would start undergoing timely repairs. Roads blocked by construction and “upgrades”, sewer, water, and electricity problems, and so forth, until they get the message.

Yeah, just turn on a fan and you’re good to go.

Yeah, just turn on a fan and you’re good to go.

Taylor Swift is amazing. If you don’t think so, that’s fine with me and probably with her as well. Love to meet her and hang out.

Here is the hidden lie that makes this a bad deal.

Here is the hidden lie that makes this a bad deal.

I only cast the charts of Fantasy Football players in which I’m considering an investment.

Cash me outside, Taylor.

Can I feel sympathy for the people affected by Harvey in Texas while still openly hating Texas? Because that’s how I feel.