Pretty much everything about Kristen Bell makes me want to hang out with her and drink wine.

Yeah, we moved some things around and that errant descriptor ended up in the wrong place. Much like Boehner's basketball-colored lips against Nancy Pelosi's cheek

I found a transcript of that moment from inside Pelosi's head:

oh boy

Yeah, that's one way to get them clean.

well, the alternative headline could've run "MAN DIES FROM DIRTY DILDO INFECTION" so the house seems a small price to pay

And tell me that flaming-dildo stock photos are a thing! Because that means I can go find more of them....

I had a coworker who chronically overshared her marital woes with me. And so I learned about "the incident."
Her husband had trouble in the erection department and for health reasons couldn't take the usual meds. So they went with a strap on, which she found to be too cold and so decided to microwave it - for FIVE…

i'm about to die of laughter now.

I don't understand, why is he boiling them? Am I supposed to be boiling all the various sex sanctioned items? I mean hot water and Dial is fine? Is it not? Is my vagina going to fall out?

Dude, you don't have to boil them. Washing them and then putting them in boiling water is enough.

"noxious dildo blaze"

Excess Pussy Creates Moral Hazard

wait so like

In terms of voting sure. But in terms of running? The problem is that the big money it takes to run for office is also held by old white christian men, and they don't like to fund other types of candidates for the most part.

And constant flocks of birds flying off of lakes. A PERSISTENT THUNDER OF WINGS.

Since I had both my arms inked, I notice people checking out the artwork, and sometimes striking up a conversation. So the "unseen male" factor is lost for me any time I wear short sleeves. But the big difference between my experience and that of any woman is that this has no implications for my safety, so I can…

I like this. I was really afraid, when I started reading this article, that is was going to be about how men carried around cakes and everyone looked at them and now they understand what it's like to walk around in public as a woman. And I'm so glad that that's not what it was.