Well, we already know they can't defeat each other by cutting off the enemy supply lines and starving them to death.

wow, dude. girls from mass don't go the gym? tell that to all the old ladies at my planet fitness who rock the full length dress and turtle neck combo.

WHEN WILL JEZEBEL STOP DEFENDING THESE MONSTERS WHO LEAVE ADULTS IN CARS! IT WOULD BE A DIFFERENT STORY IF A MAN LEFT HIS WIFE IN THE CAR! MISANDRY!!!!!

My mom bought a webcam for 20 bucks that hooks up to the wifi and rotates so we could see the cat when she came to visit me.

I have the perfect control group to test this thing out on.

I agree, I've been told by nutritionists that's it's pretty common for folks with eating disorders to conflate that disorder (or mask it) with a restrictive diet like veganism as a way to avoid questions. It's actually a tip recommended on some pro-ana sites! Which, along with folks like Morrissey and Alicia…

You know what would be a great source of protein? That passive-aggressive friend.

It's a shame that musicals and monster trucks have to be mutually exclusive.

Is she really that popular, because I've never heard of herbivore.

Get one:

The theme of the party, presumably, was "actual hell."

If I knew Sharon Stone personally, I would high-five her for that comment.

THEY HAD IT COMING!

"If you had just gone to college ..."

Oh, FUCK YOU, lady. Fuck you so hard. Meanwhile Ellie Moore, you and I are BFF's now. It is decided.

The only time anyone ever dared to make a remark like this to me, I was working at Eddie Bauer on a morning shift. Some lady took umbrage to my (corporate mandated), "Wool socks are…

I've always thought that he resembled my ex (who neglected to tell me that he had a girlfriend until they went to Thailand together approximately 7 months later) but you just nailed it.

I am also going to add that he would "forget" that he has a girlfriend until you run into him a few days later at the local coffee joint.

I am going on record here to say that Jared Leto looks like the kind of guy who would be lazy in bed because he's hot. And also he would give you chlamydia.

"Have I told you the one about my penis? Oh, never mind, it's too long,"

Dear Close Friend,

Narcissism. I know that deriding people for thinking they are "special, little snowflakes" is a bit passe, but, here, I think the phrase fits.