The last time Trump was excited about carrying something 4.5 feet tall and 60 pounds, Ivanka was 9

Don’t sweat it, man, the housekeeper has been rejecting my advances too.

Yes.

Same thing happened to his sister, Eileen.

This man is lucky to survive, he already has one foot in the grave. 

He might have lost his left leg - but he is all right now.

Imagine if Democrats, Vol. 638,306.

Counterpoint; Baths are dumb and wasteful and bad. 

It’s still cool if I piss in the bath, though, right?

Do you clean your shower/tub every day? Because if not you’re still bathing in some (however small) amount of dirt from your previous showers.

Smith wants no part of showering with Nick Foles.

As always, things are going great in Jacksonville.

“Selective Cowardice”.

It’s almost like centrist exist to fight the left instead of the right.

Yeah, for the past 40 years being the “adults” in the room has cost this country its entire middle class. 

“ If you understand the political strategy here is to make Trump look as bad as possible”

the list of players attending sounds about white

Vampire Weekend’s discography is the official soundtrack of gentrification  

What you did there, I see it.