So wait, Jess and co. picked her up in a car in Detroit and they drove to Florida the same night, danced, and did all that shit the next day? Something doesn’t add up, and I call bullshit on the story. But it IS hilarious, gotta say!

If this thing is a call for help because your abuser is “watching your every move,” wouldn't it stand that said abuser is probably watching your every move on social media as well? Asking for help on social media seems very oxymoronic in this (very serious) situation. Something about this seems gratuitous.

Am I missing something or is the question Twitter asks is “What are you doing?” Not “What are you thinking?” Either way, I could give a shit. And holy humblebrag Gigi Hadid!

Right?!? American Horror Story is an American horror story.

Someone should kick that cunt right in the...what's the word again?!? Ahh...

It’s not everyday I read something and genuinely smile, but your wonderful use of “50-11” just brought a cheese to my face. Thank you.

I’m reading a lot of comments from people saying they prefer “these many inches” as opposed to “this many inches” and so on. My question is how would one know if the lover in question has 6 inches as opposed to 7? Like are people actually having dudes whip it out, measuring it, and deciding whether or not it’s up to…

Including me.

A white family terrified by a black family and no one was shot? Oh. That’s because they were BEARS. Note to self: next time you go out black girl, be a bear. Shit’s mad easier yo.

I don’t know you from Adam (or Idris if you will), but based on the level of thirst exhibited in this comment, one could be convinced that you and the wife might want to have a serious conversation about some things. Not that there's anything wrong with that. :)

You and meeeee....we used to beeee together.......

I like how this motherfucker smoothly put in that he used to have a Samsung phone and is now an Apple customer (pitchman). Apology my ass.

This translation must have been done by someone who “knows Spanish a little.”

When will this trend in hip-hop (and life overall) of trying to look even shittier/worse than the next person stop? Just. Stop.

Reason #1 she is definitely NOT a Black woman: Black women NEVER get this much attention from the media, for ANYTHING. #byerachel

They were da bomb!

That Bizarro Tom Brady is really fucking with me. Who is that?!?

Is it butt-shaming that I'm laughing because he ain't got no ass, or is it just a shame he ain't got no ass?

We used to have weekly spelling tests on Friday. If you got every word right, you got to go to the big bowl and select a sucker or piece of candy of your choice and eat it in class (a big damn deal in the 80’s) in addition to the bragging rights over the idiots who were candy-less. Well, this particular Friday, tests…

Me thinks twas Kanye who, in 2004, rapped “Even if you in a Benz you still a nigga in a coupe.” I’d LOVE to know who he thinks is driving today.