I've befriended some of the thirstiest of the thirsties, but I find it interesting that Taylor Swift is the one chick I have yet to encounter a dude who says "I want to fuck her." Maybe she should act her age and suck some dick.

I am praying somebody gives punches every person who does this square in the fucking face. Man, woman, and child. In the words of the illustrious Jay Cutler, "donnnn't care."

Madonna's thirst is comical yet disturbing. Grow the fuck up lady.

I think the moral of the story is, if you're in the public eye, and you don't wanna be asked about your fake ass, don't get a fake ass and make a song, single artwork, and video showcasing said fake ass.

The Seattle Seahawks are some eloquent motherfuckers.

Maybe I'm an asshole, or just a Colts fan, but either way this story makes me fucking happy in so many ways.

Fuck all this Jeter noise. Paulie was THEE MAN. Hate to see you go, but very glad you came. Go go White Sox.

The only people who think it's a reach are people who aren't black. They have that luxury. We don't.

...and on next season of Scandal, angry white female journalist character gets run over by a White House tour bus, Olivia Pope gives zero fucks, enjoys big ass glass of wine... ::shutter:: ::shutter::

You can't blame Ms. Stanley for her article. I assume it has to be pretty damn difficult to write a fully fleshed piece of journalism with your head all up in your ass.

Has it really come to this J-Lo? Flagrancy? I guess the next single will be "I Suck Dick" featuring Pickles the Rapper.

And Nicki Minaj will inspire students exactly how?!? "Don't be me." Ok, I could get behind that.

He relies on info from law enforcement because their the most credible? And where exactly did the law enforcement, who had the tape, get it from? The f**cking casino! So why not go to the casino?!? He should be fired, hands down.

I'm still convinced the last season of Dexter was actually a Punk'd reboot, only Ashton Kutcher is seriously taking his time coming out from behind the scenes. Maybe he'll do it when that new show "Gotham," you know, the one about all the people in the world created for/centered around Batman that will feature all of…

"Don't record me saying this. Don't record me saying this." How about just not saying this.

I think both parties, the hacker, and the ladies are to blame. It's an unfortunate reality that we live in a world that whenever you snap a photo on your phone and send it somewhere, there's a chance, some chance that something happens and your privacy gets violated. It's not fair. But "fair" is a place where pie…

Taylor Swift is to country music what Iggy Azalea is to hip hop.

She will be interviewed by some media outlet and claim that she's not racist because she saw The Help so many times she felt inspired to go out and get one of her own, and she treats that girl oh so well!

Go*damn she's hot.

It means she's black, which really means "N." But time's bein' what they are, "Duchess," "elitist," and any other adjective will have to do, because clearly they wouldn't dare mean something more sinister now would they?