Joey Crawford: “HE WAS OUT OF CONTROL!”

If you’re in a jokey mood then why are you yelling though?

“The beatings will continue until morale improves.”

So you’re saying our kinja insults are actually compliments.

High pressure situations can make anyone crack. Sure, you laugh but I don’t know how I’d react to seeing Nick Young actually pass a ball in person either

The best job I ever had was one where the boss would just randomly rabbit punch an employee in the kidneys after every meeting. Kept you on your toes.

There’s nobody I’d rather go to war with than IT.

YELLING IS DUMB AND ACCOMPLISHES NOTHIG!!!!1!!1

Hell yeah. Love to shout and gesticulate at my coworkers until we have to be pulled apart and separated. It’s how you know things are harmonious in the workplace.

JAM: (doing a huge line) Well, John, with all due respect, I’m a bit confused.

If they’re doing coke in Bristol, why is the programming so goddamn lame?

This totally explains First Take, the coke-addled rambling of sports talk.

I had a professor who always used to say that you shouldn’t do coke at work because it turned you into a twitchy mess, and you should do heroin instead. Or maybe it was the other way around. I can never remember so I always do both just in case.

I’m just glad he went with “someone from whom I bought cocaine” as opposed to the more colloquial “someone I bought cocaine from”.

If you can’t trust your cocaine dealer, who the hell can you trust? Life is hell

[Ticking sound of a clock’s seconds hand moving]   

I figured he was run out on a rail.

It’d be nice if someone fed this guy a few hooks.