The issue is that Chik=fil-a is not just a better chicken sandwich, it actually is a nice place to purchase said sandwich. McDonalds, by and large, is not a nice place to visit.

This probably isn’t even a question. But is there a worst decision than trying to sleep next to your kid? They are 2000 degree pinwheels that make odd noises and twitch nonstop while driving their tiny feet in to your sides.

I’m still in Gooch-Fant mourning.

Ecclesiastical Denzel Washington was robbed

Counterpoint: It’s fucking Storm Duck.  STORM DUCK.

If the rumors are true Pippen’s tip is pretty huge, so no wonder he’s careful with it.

Not like that.

Sure lots of snakes don’t have arms or legs traditionally. But this one is an adder. 

Zlatan Ibrahimovish

Goal scored by Discount Zlatan

I can’t help but feel Jon Bois is partly responsible

Baker Mayfield 100% thinks he’s allowed to say the n-word and it’s going to cause a huge scandal at some point in the next three years. 

Bitter expedients. Bitter cretin. Papa John.

Rub his nose in it, otherwise he’ll never learn.

My youngest kid asks me to slice up lemons and limes so he can eat them like orange wedges. It’s like he wants to grow up to be a Radiohead song.

A Ken Burns documentary.

We were out to dinner with my father in-law. He told the waitress his order, then pointed at my 12 year old son and said “and he’ll have a shit sandwich”.

things that are slow and low:

Blame the Belluminati.

“Hey, glad you made it! Good to see you. I have those new contracts here for you to review — but first, you’ll probably want to shower. Bathroom’s right down the hall.”