You’re literally describing an arcade.

So a real $100 million or like the $100 million that the NFL pledged to their concussion initiative that they spent maybe $15 million on?

I can’t find video of it but if you owned Smash Brothers for the n64, selected computer control for four jigglypuffs at the lowest ability setting, you ended up with a match in which it is plausible that our president is at the controls.... Jigglypuffs walking off platforms, not knowing how to get on the platform and…

That’s all true but it feels like the video itself is meant as a more murderous echo of Abu Ghraib, which seems like it already did the damage Cerberus would conceivably do

It should be very easy to pick between those two options for the rest of the season.

FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, STOP READING. LET THAT BE THE ONLY THING YOU TAKE FROM THIS ARTICLE.

I thought the last 10 months would have been sufficient warning about the dangers of replacing a competent black man with an inexperienced and unqualified white guy, but here we are again.

The one list where “being hit by a car” would’ve been the best option.

wow. Not a dry Mike in the building.

And this is him when people are watching.

America: “wow, hearing accusations about a crazy Republican senate candidate from Alabama is probably the least surprising scandal ever!”

I read that as “catch me I’m going to fart,” which would be an appropriate response to all Jameis Winston stories.

Cut them some slack. Not many people realize that Die Hard was an adaptation of Wuthering Heights.

The Browns are America, then. We are all Browns.

Similarly, my daughter’s basketball team last night named their plays “Sparkle Pony,” “Beanie Boo,” and “Chainsaw Massacre.”

No, no, no. It’s ok for Harbaugh to recruit teens.

I just wanted to say, fuck you, for calling pizza, za.

It’s actually a heartfelt message to his lover, Stan D.

Even worse, he decided to rub it in and gopher two