Fun fact, I thought Tom Clancy was a video game developer until I was like 20.

Please don’t report on small studies like this. Even gizmodo has talked about how studies like this are often misrepresented. Its honestly shocking that this paper got published at all. They only had data for 15 people. That hardly has any statistical significance in the real world. Maybe there’s some actual…

Every story after Red October still feints in the direction of making him a deskbound nerd, but they never have the balls to go through. It always ends up like that headline image, with ‘Jack Ryan the analyst’ with a rifle in the back of a helicopter or some shit. He’s just another USA Action Man now.

Clear and Present Danger was a great Tom Clancy movie. Harrison does a good job of just being an analyst in that one too. The few times he has to engage, he’s portrayed as clumsy.

Between this and that gawd-awful Benghazi movie, is Jim from the Office hiding some extremely regrettable politics?

 It's like knockoff Chris Pratt. 

I still cannot buy him as an action hero of any kind.

I mean, yeah. Jack Ryan is the American ideal in one tightly knit package: he knows everything, is physically at the peak, is a rugged individual who is always against impossible odds, who can look experts in the eye and say ‘I know better than you’, and ultimately discards all negotiation in favor of brusque violence.

That Grandpa email of the week was fucking fantastic.

“Fuck yeah it does!”

America’s last great vice? What about voting against one’s self interest? That still seems to turn a lot of people on.

Geriatric vampires?

I mean, the “graphic design” of the can should let you know what you’re getting into...

My friends and I were at a bar surrounded by obese (is there any other kind) Pittsburgh fans during this game. They got so pissed when we started actively cheering for the Ravens, and upon the Ravens winning their comeback to us was “Enjoy watching the playoffs from home!”, like the dip shits didn’t even realize they…

No matter how bad Pittsburgh is, no one is grateful to live in Indiana.

“That’s like the US losing a ground war against the KISS Army.”

That moment also produced one of the greatest NFL memes in internet history:

browns fan here: i actually was rooting for the browns to lose that game, just because the steelers missing the playoffs meant so much more to me than the browns finishing with a winning record.

The best part for Steelers haters is that the team stayed on the field to watch the end of the CLE-BAL game on the final Sunday of the regular season, hoping for a Browns win so PIT could make the playoffs. The Browns naturally lost. I can’t think of a better ending for these shiteaters than to be reduced rooting for…