I'll venture a guess that any parent not feeling particularly obliged to regularly bathe their children and their clothes before school probably won't be moved by a rather condescending note from the teacher.

So last weekend, I decide to cut to the chase with a guy who has building crazy sexual tension with me by way of some very heated text messages. This dude lives out of town. Long story short, I tell him that I intend to take him home with me and he'd be a fool not to come.

WOOP WOOP it's WILD CONJECTURE TIME!!

I have such a fondness for my Roomba that this article made me actually sad. Like really, for real sad.

Thanks for the scholarship, stupid.

I think ladies have a hard time understanding the nut pain thing because all of our junk is on the inside. So when we experience pain, it's this horrible kind of cursed, long-term pain in most cases. With you guys, shit happens to your junk, from the outside. That's the difference between stomach cramps and being…

Awww yisssss..... Smart Lady Appearance comments.....

As someone who has used Google products to help me combat crippling ADD (I would not have a job as a newspaper editor without being able to stay electronically connected and compulsively organized), and, in a round-about way, helped me rise to a level of achievement that suits my talents and abilities, I can't really…

Be my mentor, plz? Yours wins.

My First "Maybe Marriage" SO and I got into one of those above-mentioned Huge Fights today. He was right about all of his call-outs about our relationship, but he did it in a pretty shitty way. He's usually the most considerate person when it comes to choosing his words, and today he chose a string of really shitty…

I need that suit.

You are a good friend and a sane person. I salute you and your completely reasonable reaction and self-knowledge on this issue. Handled that one....

When I was a makeup artist at Sephora, we got trained by a NARS runway artist. A woman asked him how she could apply her lipstick and keep it on through eating.

Real quick, as a really decent person who grew up privileged, I just wanted to duck in and remind everyone that having money doesn't necessarily make you a selfish dickbag. These people are dickbags, but for reasons unrelated to selfishness.

The bicycle came careening toward Ms. Paltrow outside of the Calvin Klein show. With just feet between them, Ms. Kidman stepped directly in front of the cyclist's path.

I have interns upload and post things to my employer's high-traffic website all the time without really looking at them that hard.
I am suddenly haunted by how few clicks I am away from doing this at work. God forgive those of us charged with churning out constant web content, and may he be merciful to us.

I love working for women—especially women over 50. They tend to be more sensitive to the group dynamics that are the most effective. They also tend to lead by example and positive reinforcement. But that's just my experience with 4 female bosses over 50.

I think I fell in love for the first time today, because my boyfriend was away for five days and he wanted to have sex so bad that he gave no shits I was on my period. The following exchange occurred: