If it makes you feel better, I saw this comment and couldn’t figure out what was wrong at first. I was also listening to The Beatles at the time, so, eek.

How many Maserati drivers you know make $50K a year?

The hell is that green leafy shit on there? Crisp iceberg lettuce or GTFO with the greens. It’s a homemade burger, not a fuckin’ gourmet cheeseburger salad!

Julie Ertz is married to Philadelphia Eagles tight end Zach Ertz

#WelcomeTanguy

Millie Bright

This is a downer of a White Sox Minute™.

There’s always the possibility that this could all go sideways and implode

::reads Woj tweet::

“a few issues logging in once”

If Manchester City did this, UEFA would send a SWAT team in to seize control of the club.

Man, you’re REALLY dedicated to internet commenting.

The Mets are so Metsy that they have caused people in Philadelphia to believe that the presence of a now-increasing number of bamboo plants in the clubhouse is responsible for the recent turnaround of the Phillies’ fortunes.

The franchise isn’t “cursed.” It’s just guilty of, to use the parlance of the site, constantly shooting itself in the dick. Right now, the bullets are ricocheting off the Mets’ proverbial dick and hitting them in the eye, leading them to accidentally pull the trigger again and blow off what remains of the dick. I…

You’re ignoring that the Lakers got bailed out by the Wizards, who currently don’t have a general manager.

I mean, crack would explain a lot about the Mets.

As far as I understand, you’re not supposed to “shove” them.

As a Phillies fan watching this game, I knew the game was won when Callaway yanked the starter who throws absolute junk but had struck out 10 in 6.1 innings on less than 80 pitches and held the Phillies to like two hits, I think?

Just another day in South American soccer.

This is what passes for a big Miguel Cabrera play nowadays—an infield single made possible by a throwing error, captioned with a patronizing “atta boy.”