Currently snorting my birth control off of the back of a bar toilet while googling clinics that perform hysterectomies on otherwise healthy 30-year-olds.

I’ve been struggling with this. I feel like I stalk mom’s of other kids my age.

Preparing for their move to the Tower Of Babel?

I think Girl Scout Cookies may be an acquired taste.

OW

DAMN bruh!

Notice how there’s no wine for dogs? Because people with dogs have friends.

By your logic, the book should have never been made into a musical.

Insert *I’m ok with this.gif*

Mine is mostly canine.

It’s ALWAYS plausible! I can binge-watch that thing for hours and nod the whole time thinking to myself “...yeah...I can see that”. I even drove out to Area 51 and took a picture next to the black (later white and now removed) mailbox. The Santa Clara convention center is down the street from where my sister lives. I…

She does realize that alternative history is a genre of fiction and not an actual discipline like history, archaeology and anthropology, right? Right?

What I’m getting out of this is that someone took Megan Fox on a tour of a power plant and told her it was the Great Pyramid of Giza.

*high ranking official to other high ranking official*: "Hey wanna fuck with some gullible Americans today?"

It’s the 17% problem. If a crowd has 17% women, men believe the gender division is 50/50.

When we exist it’s just TOO MUCH.

Damn! I love it when they lay the smack down. Once, out at the range, a visiting officer commented on how there were "so many women out here." There were exactly four of us. We pretty much just rolled our eyes and were like "Yes, sir."

Classic toddler handling. Don’t tell me you’ve never done it.

As a certified comtesse*, I assure you: you can never have too much debaucherous sex in depictions of 17th century French nobility. We nobles are filthy, filthy animals.