Oh, come on. My crippling alcoholism is a fine religion, if you ask me.

Sharia law would be fine if it had more Jesus.

That is literally the same excuse some ultraconservative Salafist/Wahhabist might give. Although I imagine the people who’d flip out over that are somehow okay with this.

Title Nein

I’m sure the same people are falling over themselves to give to the Komen foundation, which mostly exists to keep itself in existence.

It’s really got to be hard to be your father’s second choice for a date.

If you implemented this at the university level, you could solve a bunch of the systemic problems plaguing higher education. Administrative bloat is a huge problem. In the past 20 years (probably more like 45, but I’ll be kind) admin has skyrocketed. Take a look at these numbers from the California university system.…

She was Ann Coulter when Ann Coulter was just a little boy.

This is a magnificent obituary and is exactly how she deserves to be memorialized.

It's their fucking job, regardless of who they feel is respecting them or not.

Nothing should say “it’s over” like Paris Hilton photographing her way through your event

Ironically, these are terrible conditions for motorboating.

This is some fine reporting, and an interesting topic.

“Hillary Clinton is also letting the GOP off the hook for decades of strategic, institutional racism.”

ironically, probably the last time the republicans were on the right side of history, too.

“It was just sarcasm/satire/Hillary’s fault.”

Now I want a show starring Jeff Goldblum as a talk show doctor, caught between money and morals and comedic mishaps

I’ve heard that’s 93% fatal. Sad!

This has been a truly fun week.

This is a damn hipster problem. Wear those tight ass pants and kill your phone. Come over to the magical world of cargo shorts. I have room for my phone, a fax machine, a side of beef, a wallet, and interestingly enough, spare cargo shorts.