I am so sorry you are dealing with this. I hope these ideas help:

"Who are you wearing?"

I almost said that! Being really respected within your field and totally unknown outside of it would be cool too.

To be honest, Giuliana, I've mostly been eating cotton balls and I want to shake your giant head until your eyes fall out.

I wanna be 'famous' the way like, obscure academics are 'famous.' No one I don't know knows what I look like, but several hundred people I've never met know who I am.

Posted this on Hamilton's article, but I think it warrants repeating:

I wish that Jennifer Aniston would tell them she gave birth to a dozen babies in the limo.

You don't know this woman! You're acting like being a "grandmother" puts her in the white haired old lady baking pies and giving out sage wisdom category, but she could just as easily be in the 3rd generation crime family has her grandkids out on the street corners hustling category.

Thanks for clearing this up. I was picturing someone making out with cookware.

Jesus Christ, no.

A lot of women, myself included, often have tampons in their purses even when we're not on our periods. What would the actual ongoing bleeding prove, exactly? Sounds like the guard is a perv.

I like to imagine that there's a woman out there who hasn't come forward, but responded to the guards' order to prove she was menstruating by reaching up her skirt right in front of all of them and pulling out her bloody tampon for all to see. And maybe a little menstrual fluid accidentally got splattered on their…

Back in my late 90s raver days, a friend's mom used to freak out about us wearing pants very similar to this because they collected "fecal matter and mucii" as they dragged on the ground (I don't think mucii is actually a word, or at least as what she thought it meant). She would make us hoist them up when we entered…

I wish I could function on less than 8-9. I can for a day or two but I start to feel like shit quickly. It sucks because my day starts around 5 which means that counting fall asleep time I'm going to bed at like 8 PM.

Adults (26-64): 7-9 hours each day.

FMK: shark, palm tree, beach ball

He turns to his bright-eyed eight year old, sitting but two feet from me, and says, "You see son? This is why you should stay in school."(FFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU)

I hope he finds out he is number 4 in the rotation because his dick game is kind of weak.

Honestly, Rihanna bossing around Leonardo DiCaprio and finding him subpar is basically every sex dream I have ever had.

#NotAllMeerkats