Or “The Emperor’s New Clothes”
Gilded Mildew?
I better get royalties
It’s a bummer that it stops right around when it would actually be helpful.
Post-partum Pink
It’s something people should really only do if they are going to be photographed and want to look super fancy. But I don’t think a lot of people understand that, and it’s becoming more common for people to use this as like an everyday look, and tbh a lot of people just do not have the skill level to make it look good…
A friend of mine was telling me how her baby liked to play with her nipple in her mouth, how cute, blah, blah. I cringed as I remembered playing with the nipple was what led both of my kids to bite me. I warned her, though I didn’t think much of it, and figured it was just my weirdo kids. The baby bit her the next…
I nearly slapped my baby in the face when that happened. Asshole!
The feeling that someone tried to use jumper cables on my nipples as I “let down” was far more uncomfortable than the contractions.
“A new study?”
If we shove our beautiful life-affirming wrinklestars in your face, it is because you need it. We can’t enough of our wonderful poopy ports, and neither can you.
Notice how the cat in the video is walking unnaturally like he is trying to run away from the thing on his ass. Also, he had death in his eyes.
I mean, my cat has a pretty good strategy for drawing eyes to his asshole - sitting ostentatiously in the middle of the living room and giving it an extremely loving and thorough cleaning in front of anyone who crosses our threshold. “Look at my asshole” he is saying “it is mine, and it is beautiful.” Am I going to…
1. My cats would not go for this, I’m pretty sure all of them think their unadorned assholes are glorious.
Diaphragms were awesome for birth control. By the time you were able to get it in right you were too tired to fuck. I remember one time (in band camp) in college laying on the bathroom floor crying. The preparation of damn thing made it one drop of nonoxyl 9 away from being as slippery as a greased pig. The metal…
Yeah, but did your mom’s diaphragm look like a little purple whale, or a tiny bathtub?
oh my christ how did she not DIE. That sounds terrible.
And if we had a means to leave now, I’d be on that first boat out.
