Just 57 minutes of Giuliani unknowingly admitting crime after crime after crime in between confusedly reading For Hims ad copy.

In that top photo Half-Scoop looks much younger than his 41 years. This is not necessarily a compliment. It’s the ‘do, the facial hair, the clothing and the way he’s wearing it. He looks like he’s entering a sophomore formal at a particularly bro-ish college with a 96% acceptance rate.

That and the fact he wrote a book called TRIGGERED and brought his girlfriend on tour to yell at hecklers who were mean to him. 

She looks like Catherine Zeta Jones after 5 minutes in the microwave.

Haley is playing the long game. Batshit is the new black. Don’t think for a minute that when Trump goes everything goes back to normal. Someone has to pander to those voters and they are fucking legion. I bet she primaries Tim Scott, uses that as a platform for 2024. Or she’s positioning herself for State in case…

I want you to picture yourself as a Moroccan woman who has worked under dangerous conditions for years to fight for basic education and rights for women and girls and this blond bit of nothing shows up and you have to do this mummers play of obsequiousness. I’d go home and punch a wall down.  

Why on earth would I be interested in being fair to this vapid bobblehead of a human?

As the son of a rich white man, I know I’m not allowed to have an opinion, let alone voice it these days.

Also it needs to be emphasized that, although I am not a big fan of Pelosi and would love to see the speakership in new hands, she isn’t “bad”. That’s just ridiculous. Being not a left was we would like does not make someone “bad” by default. JFC.

Yes, Trump wears diapers. hahahaha

LOL Wall Street, Pharma, and Zuckerburg’s choice tool?

“But if anyone wants to defend keeping those high profits for insurance companies, and those high profits for drug companies, and not making the top 1 percent pay a fair share in taxes, and not making corporations pay a fair share in taxes, then I think they’re running in the wrong presidential primary.”

Joe, do you want to know what the most elite thing you can do in America?

“It’s totally fine that I sell poop shakes to young girls because the money goes to people who really need it.”

I used to have a lot of guy friends in high school. I also had really nosy neighbors. One day a neighbor came to our door and said to my father “Is your daughter allowed to have boys over when you’re not here?” obviously stirring up shit and trying to get me in trouble. My father replied “I don’t want to make my…

I had a male roomate that would check with me to see if I needed “supplies” when he was near the feminine hygine section of the store. I found it both mortifying and endearing.

A talk my dad had with me, also at around 14, when my mum was away on vacation for a week: “I’m going grocery shopping. If you need me to pick up tampons or condoms, let me know. Not that I’m assuming you need either of those things at this moment, but the offer is there”.

This is the talk my biker Dad had with me at 14: “Hey kiddo, I’m pretty sure you aren’t thinking about it yet, but when you feel you might need some birth control just let me know, and I’ll take you to the doctor or Planned Parenthood. No questions, no problems” Sure, it was awkward as hell, but in his own way he was…

This made me remember back when my dad suspected I was dating he said he could take me to a doctor and he could verify if I was a virgin still, I wasn’t anymore, but I was 16 and I was terrified that he would find out, I just insisted that I was still one and to butt out, thankfully he dropped the topic, but I always…

If I’m that doctor, the Hippocratic oath requires me to lie to that fucking creepy-ass, boundary-challenged parent. “Yup. Still there. Like a Capri Sun, fresh out of the carton, up in there.”