Mark, this picture just made me fall in love with you even harder.

As a member of that Troll Patrol team, I want to second Slay's position here. It was a system and a pretty basic one. It also allowed much easier access for Jez readers to find one of us and make requests for bannings.

YOU DO NOT KNOW MY LIFE.

Wait. When were we "good?"

Or a social experiment? We had a program at my college where the kids were assigned to go to restaurants and eat with their hands, then record the reactions. Part of the Sociology degree.

Ok, first, that is fucking horrible. But second, it's so fucking typical. People lose their MINDS at Disney. I've seen parents scream into toddlers' faces, "STOP CRYING YOU SHOULD BE HAVING FUN." Happiest place on earth? My. shiny. white. ass.

Let me just say that I think it's best you never made eye contact...

Wait, WHAT? WHY?

When I worked on Disney property, the most often asked question was, "What time does the 3 o'clock parade start?" I don't know if we should blame the heat or being on vacation or what, but tourists are a special breed.

Did you seriously suggest that because I've observed bigoted patterns of behavior in my home region that I'm mentioning it to "keep our undesirables?" Back to your cave, troll.

I LIVE here, moron.

I just want to point out that the picture of the needle packet via that link? Features "DOUBLE SWALLOW BRAND" needles.

The owner claims it's for anyone who takes a "moment" of spirituality, but let's be real — this is the South. The only people praying in restaurants are Christians. You really think other religions feel comfortable praying in public, in light of society's bigoted reactions to, say, head-scarves? Pffft.

I think we're related. My mother would say the exact same thing. Except I have no ink. I'm too indecisive.

I completely want to hang out with you.

Great dirt bag!!

From the pre-Mr. MacNasty files...

TRIAD OF DEATH

That is seriously depressing.

You're missed at GT. A LOT. Send me a DM on Twitter some time!!