WAY TO GO, PAUL

She’s amazing. MOST of her speech was amazing, but...

Super Mario 3D World was a full 3D Mario. It’s even on the title, dammit!

“quacking in its boots”

“Wrong hole dummies”

Midpack, like always.

Can’t they work in Jeremy Mayfield as a former racer turned methhead Iroc-Z stealing parts from the Piston Cup garage?

I’m stoked about this game and am literally counting the days ‘til I can play it. The exploration, the atmospheric puzzles—it all sounds great! There is one thing that bugs me, though.

Too bad he’s an anti-science, anti-GMO douchenozzle. Except for when it comes to his insulin. Then he’s perfectly okay with GMOs. So I reckon that makes him a hypocritical douchenozzle.

Yar, there be hockey AND fish sticks here!

Wouldn’t you be mad if you found out some 12 y.o. was giving it to your mum?

For those of you high and mighty naysayers in the comments who cannot comprehend as to why in the world someone would throw a controller over a video game, I am finding your lack of passion and low energy disturbing. You are the Jeb Bushes of video games. 

Ha! I caught that Exorcist reference! Take that Dad, I *am* using my Film degree!

You forgot “The Crush”

Just squeeze the little fucker as hard as you can, and if it breaks THEN GOOD! FUCK!

And “The Halo 3”
Scream FUCKING LAG YOU FUCK while throwing the controller as far away from you as possible but forgetting to remove your headset so it tears your ears off and then step on the controller many…

Sure the night nurse was impressed, but what of the butler, chef and groundskeepers?!

...these kinds of half-hearted apologies are all you can expect from people who are used to getting away with things.

It COULD be that the complexities of the NFL are somewhat exaggerated.

So they’re going to put a BIGLY heavy road car out there, without a sway bar, and with high compression rear suspension and a light front suspension, PLUS put DOT-approved drag radials??? I’ve read that they’re supposed to ship with Nitto NT555R tires, which are DOT-approved, but even so, they’re not going to handle…

The best is Vitale screaming “I can’t believe it” like an average Syracuse team beating an over ranked Duke squad at the Carrier Dome is some kind of “Miracle on Ice” like upset.