Obama is so handsome. Not just by comparison, but goddammit. It’s like putting a glass of French wine next to a half empty PBR that’s mostly backwash.

You’ve been full for 20 years. Do they still publish poetry in the Greenpoint Gazette?

Oh 100 percent. It would definitely have to be a subscription-based model. “The classiest and most luxurious news for only $7.99/mo. It’s yuuuuge!”

One of the things that destroyed Joplin was her self-loathing. She was so incredibly insecure about her appearance. I just wonder if Williams if physically right for the role.

She is quite smart. I respected her until she joined his campaign. She is amazingly brilliant at what she does but the evil is literally eating her from the inside out.

Perhaps the reason why this info is surfacing now is because it’s pretty much the point of no return. At any other time he might be replaced with an opponent with better chances of winning but now that people have started to vote already...

I know Trump is a rich vein to mine, but I’m hoping The Slot can make the post election transition and keep rolling because this is my favorite subblog.

I dream of the day I’ll be able to open Jezebel and not see the hairy cheeto with the anus mouth all over the first page.

A nervous Reince Priebus walks into the Throne Room at Trump Tower, prepared to try to play his last hand. It’s a desperate move, but these are desperate times. The Trump is sitting at his desk, The Day The World Turned Day Glo hair disarranged gruesomely. Nietzsche said every blade of grass had its own agenda—was it…

Guys, we don’t WANT them to withdraw their support of Trump. We don’t want them to all say Trump should step down, and Pence should be at the top of the ticket. We don’t WANT Pence at the top of the ticket. We want to keep Trump there.

This show is SO GOOD. Issa Rae is hilarious, and I cannot recommend it highly enough.

Yeah, that’s why I suggest my own twist on this with a group chat app. Makes it a lot more tolerable. All the good without the bad.

Libertarians are the fucking worst. Grow the fuck up.

This reminds me of that Stephen King books where pre-teens have group sex in a sewer to save Maine or something.

The Barber Adagio for Strings is quintessential sad music.

Can we stop disparaging coke users by linking them to Donald Trump?

I was riding my big wheel through a hotel my dad was looking after during off season(so he could write a book) and i came up to a room, where i shit you not, some guy in a dog suit was giving head to another guy. they both became aware of my presence and i fled. this was the 80s, before furries, mind you.

suppose they gave a divorce and nobody came?

I do not want you to harm yourself in any way or commit suicide. Please don’t do this.