Ye Gods, Thanksgiving! My mother used to do Thanksgiving - extremely overcooked turkey, gravy from a powdered packet, plastic bag of rolls, Stove Top Stuffing - you get the picture. I’d gladly eat at your house! But fear not, the total lack of culinary anything that my younger brother and I endured actually caused…

My mother hated to cook but she did in the same way as your mom, cans of cream of celery soup, packets of ranch dip or breadcrumbs, canned vegetables.

I would ask “Are you me?” but it was my dad instead of my mom. Everything he made had something processed in it.

Someone might want to explain to them how Catholicism works.

Has David Foster married and divorced the server yet?

Or maybe just don’t smoke in any public bathrooms anywhere. Other people have asthma, allergies ect and also would like to take a piss without smelling like an ashtray at the end.

Numerous reporters spotted carts of Bud Light being rolled into the Capitol in preparation for a GOP House celebration.

I am an atheist, but the one thing that makes me think maybe the devil is real (and pretty good at his job) are the people who have completely mutated Christianity as a vehicle of hate and oppression.

Mariah. It’s called “The Change.” Just go with it. Run after the dancer, get too drunk, let yourself go for a year, find a tulip and scream at, then hold it tenderly as you sob.

When I was a wee lass dad would take me into the office some Saturday afternoons..I would pretend “file” papers (loved that for some reason), staple stuff together, sit at the desk....in my imagination I was a “business lady”. That how I see Ivanka A child playing in daddy’s office

“becoming a builder.”

Honestly, annoying as it is, I feel bad* for them. They’re clearly trying to make ends meet and have bought the “If you just work hard enough (read: harrass your friends and family to buy shit) you too can be rich and live comfortably!” lie the MLM schemes sell.

I agree. She genuinely believes that she has made her way, has lots of fresh insights and big ideas, and has figured out how to have it all. Reality, as the vast majority understand it, is not a factor. She was born with money and given more when she wanted it. She has attended excellent schools — not through her…

“Learn to figure out when a hoot or a holler is indeed a form of harassment and when it’s merely a good-natured tease that you can give back in kind.”

This terrifying creature is not a human. She’s the offspring of Skynet and the aliens from They Live. I have never seen such absurdity rendered into such flavorless, meaningless pellets.

Also — also! — her suprasternal notch, also known as the jugular notch (thanks, Wikipedia!), doesn’t that seem awfully low? Did they lengthen her neck? The mind reels!

“Your life’s happiness begins with you.”

Would be cool to send a pallet of these books to the factories that make her fashion brand to inspire and empower those ladies. Just rewrite the rules, girls!

This is the utterly charmless book version of what a kid thinks “work” is like.

Hey! Come on now! She worked very hard to enbiggen her vocabulary with such cromulent words!