Me: Prove it.

Prove it.

You didn’t prove 1/ That you would not exist 2/ That “all” of our lives, not just yours are “infinitely better” and 3/ That all your claims are a direct result of “these historical events.”

Not even close. How surprising.

lol No. That’s not what I’m asking grandpa. Can you not follow a conversation?

Okay. Prove it.

Then why celebrate events that you can’t definitively say made your life and the world around you any “better?”

In the parallel universe where those atrocities never occurred, a much happier, healthier and wealthier version of yourself is laughing at you you now.

lol then you should literally celebrate every event in the history of time and space instead of just the life of Chris Columbus. Thats kind of a crappy stand in for what you’re talking about. What you’re talking about would be much better as a Flying Spaghetti Monster Day.

-Led the first European expedition to the Americas in nearly 500 years

Okay. So then answer my original question. What were his accomplishments?

lol I am literally working on some art for that company right now. Good times, their store in the Noog is pretty bitchin’.

lol okay man. Have fun at the Arnold.

Holy shit I can’t even.

They already have too many statues they don’t need.

lol Okay Chad. Thanks for stopping by. Real worthwhile stuff you’ve got there.

Columbus is a shithole devoid of character. There is one nice neighborhood. The German Village. Short of that its just a strip mall with too many drunk college kids. Most of whom are on a massive amount of steroids and trying to fight every lamp post they come in contact with.

I’m not sure if that makes sense, but if it does I will fight and die for Chris Cbus.

The convenience of the timing aside… That doesn’t answer my question. We could have just as easily called it “Pre-Europe is stupid and thinks the world is flat” and “Post-Europe is stupid but now most of them don’t think the world is flat.”

Everyone already calls it Shithole, OH so its cool. Enjoy your strip malls Shithole, OH. The old COSI was way cooler.